Have you noticed the tops that are fashionable now, the ones that billow out below the bustline—sort of like maternity wear of yore? Some even have those cute puffy sleeves like my old maternity tops. The availability of these styles is good news and bad news and good news:
The good news is that the loose, flowing fabric can cover a multitude of your ingestive sins, such as the bag of pita chips that disappeared while you were watching “The Good Wife.”
The bad news is that, unless you sport a perfectly flat belly, these loose-across the stomach styles can make you look pregnant.
The good news is that if anyone mistakenly asks you, “When are you due?” you can bask in the glory of knowing that at least one person on Earth thinks you may be young enough to actually get pregnant. This poor misguided soul thinks you haven’t gone through menopause yet.
My own reason for wearing one of these tops is that I’ve been enjoying food too much these past few months. While a hearty appetite can be a sign of good physical and mental health, my jeans and cropped pants don’t agree. In protest, they pinch and strain, displaying a more rounded belly than I remember seeing last year. My only recourse is to wear the big top that flowingly covers my bulge. And bravely risk looking pregnant.